webinar marketing

Milana Leshinsky – Telesummits aren’t dead! How Great Webinar Marketing Can Make a Huge Impact for Your Small Business! (AoL 118)

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Webinars, telesummits, and virtual summits. They used to be a staple in digital marketing.

In recent years, however, they’ve become rarer to see.

Why?

Because for the most part, people have used them primarily as a way to build their email list. They used it primarily as part of their funnel.

While this is a function that webinars can serve, we shouldn’t overestimate their power to connect us with thought leaders in our various industries.

Today’s guest, Milana Leshinsky, is on a mission to help people see the power that telesummits (aka virtual summits) can provide for a small business.

On top of finding out how she got to be such a huge advocate of these mediums, we find out how they’ve played a role in her own business. She also talks about the mindset you should have when building your own virtual summit.

 

SPECIFICALLY, YOU’LL FIND OUT MORE ABOUT:

  • How was it that Milana first came to the US? 9:12
  • What made her change her focus of study in school from music to something completely different? 11:32
  • Why did she quit her IT job in 2002 as a mom of two? What did it get her in a relatively short amount of time? 13:25
  • How has digital marketing changed during her career? 17:10
  • Why should someone do a telesummit and what makes a good one? 19:53
  • In what ways has she been able to get back into her artistic roots? 39:00
  • What’s Milana looking forward to working on? 45:04
  • Who have been influencers in Milana’s life? 47:40
  • What are three books that she tells others about? 49:13
  • What’s something Milana has been good to saying no to? 51:37
  • What is her least favorite social custom? 52:43
  • How can someone find their own personal freedom? 54:26

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.

 

ITEMS and PEOPLE MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

SHOW NOTE EXTRAS:

Virtual Summits & Telesummits

Fastest Path to Go To Expert

Future of Video Marketing with Michelle Kopper

Jeremy and Milana on Sales in Coaching

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, and/or Google Play Music. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!

Cheers!

social innovation

Solving Community Problems through Social Innovation with Harrison Painter (AoL 117)

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Having a business is one thing, but starting one that’s on a mission to make an impact in your community is something else. Especially one that focuses on creating Massive Positive Social Impact.

What does that mean exactly?

Well imagine if your sole focus of your business is to amplify purpose driven entrepreneurs, creators, and nonprofit founders in your community. This is what Amplify Indy and it’s creator, Harrison Painter is all about.

By working with Collaborate 317, Harrison has helped start an awesome community through the Amplify Hope Program.

In this interview with Harrison, you’ll learn what it’s all about and what sparked this vision.

It’s our hope that you’ll want to make Massive Positive Social Impact in your area and join us in the Junto on Facebook.

SPECIFICALLY, YOU’LL FIND OUT MORE ABOUT:

  • How did Harrison originally get into marketing and event promotion? 7:19
  • How did he realize that it was time to leave the traditional job world and strike out on his own? 13:22
  • What made him move to LA with his business? What’s the difference between there and the midwest? 21:00
  • How did Amplify get off the ground? 33:34
  • What are some secrets to launching and marketing an event? 44:07
  • What’s the Amplify Hope Program all about? 47:36
  • What else is Harrison looking forward to in 2018? 55:43
  • What are three favorite movies or documentaries? 1:04:13
  • One gift he likes giving others? 1:06:21
  • What’s a topic people should be talking about hardly anyone is? 1:07:57
  • What was something Harrison believed when he was 30 and now believes was inaccurate? 1:13:46
  • How can someone be a difference maker in their community? 1:15:27

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.

 

ITEMS and PEOPLE MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

SHOW NOTE EXTRAS:

Harrison reveals the Amplify Hope Challenge:

Dr. Pingnan Shi shares with us the Amplify Youth Program:

Thomas “TAG” Griffin shares with us Hearts in Hand Homeless Outreach

Thank You, Sam Ash from HIH: Homeless Outreach

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, and/or Google Play Music. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!

Cheers!

hospitality consulting

Mike Thorp – Less Talk and More Creation! – How Saying No to Gary Vaynerchuk Helped Launch a Hospitality Consulting Business (AoL 114)

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There’s a reason that many businesses fail in the first several years of business.

Of course, finances might play a part in that. But I think that even having a revenue problem is the sign of a deeper issue.

The issue is simply that business ownership doesn’t necessarily make one a great leader.

And without the ability to paint a vision and help employees see what’s going on, of course a company is going to fold.

Today’s guest, Mike Thorp, helps restaurants with this problem. He says that what he does for his clients is a combination of Hell’s Kitchen and The Profit. He loves what he’s doing, as you’ll find out.

But doing his own thing – it came at a cost. As creatives, we find out that to create our consumption must go down. And sometimes, we have to cut it out completely.

That’s exactly what Mike had to do with Gary V.

So in today’s chat, we’ll hear all about what Mike brings to the table with his business, but we’ll also learn what motivated Mike to pull the plug on Gary.

Enjoy!

 

SPECIFICALLY, YOU’LL FIND OUT MORE ABOUT:

  • How’d Mike get started in the restaurant industry? 9:43
  • How does Mike view leadership and culture in the restaurant industry? 15:16
  • What’s an important role he sees his company doing for local students? 22:02
  • Does he only work with local businesses around Grand Rapids? 26:53
  • What was his transition like going from corporate work to consulting? 30:43
  • What does Mike wake up for in the morning? 34:18
  • What lead Mike to write his viral post on Medium? 42:28
  • Why do so many people have trouble leaving the consumer mindset to becoming a creative? 50:37
  • What are some of the things Mike’s looking forward to? 52:39
  • What are his three top favorite books? 54:50
  • What’s a fact from today that would blow the mind from someone ten years ago.? 56:41
  • Smallest decision he’s made that’s made the largest impact? 57:08
  • What’s a life skill that he’s amazed people lack? 58:44
  • How can someone be a difference maker in their community? 1:01:44

Right click here and save-as to download this episode to your computer.

 

ITEMS and PEOPLE MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

 

SHOW NOTE EXTRAS:

Last Video You Have to Watch:

Cy Wakeman on The #AskGaryVee Show:

Danny Meyer – The Convergence of Casual and Fine:

Michael Shafer reviews the Oz Principle:

Thanks for Listening!

Thanks so much for joining us again this week. Have some feedback you’d like to share? Leave a note in the comment section below!

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the top of the post.

Also, please leave an honest review for The AoL Podcast on iTunes! Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated! They do matter in the rankings of the show, and we read each and every one of them.

If you have any questions feel free to email them over via the email mentioned in the show or by our contact form.

And finally, don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, and/or Google Play Music. It’s absolutely free to do so.

A huge thank-you to you guys for joining us!

Cheers!

places of interest

10 Ways to Find Places of Interest In Your Own Backyard

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When I was growing up, I lived in a small town in the middle of flyover country. (I wouldn’t be until later that I even knew that the Midwest was called that.) One of my biggest goals in high school was to go out and see the world. This interest, I’m pretty sure stemmed from watching way too much Discovery Channel over the years.

That, and well, mom was an art teacher. And she loved teaching art from around the world.

It just seemed like something I was always going to do.

Then college hit and I ended up telling myself that if I wanted to graduate on time, I need to book it. Traveling abroad, for the foreseeable future, was not in my cards.

Even though that was the case, I did do a fair share of domestic traveling during the long college summers. When I wasn’t taking a summer class, you could find me making road trips to all kinds of places east of the Mississippi.

Sure, that might not sound like a lot compared to other online entrepreneurs, but here’s the thing. I feel like I appreciate more of what we have in our own backyards a little more than others might.

I don’t feel like I need to leave the country to get the same benefits they do.

Heck, there are still places here in the Midwest that are on my list to check out!

That being the case and it being a new year, I thought I’d share with you guys some of my favorite ways to engage more with your own hometown or places that aren’t so far away.

That way you still get some of the benefits of traveling, but don’t have to go out of the country!

 

1. Pick up Travel Guides and Local Magazines for Nearby Destinations 

This is probably one of my go to cheats in finding interesting things to do when I’m traveling around Indiana. When I was working at AMS daily back in 2014, we found ourselves going to various towns around Indiana as part of our whirlwind tour of events. When I was at those towns, I made sure that I got travel brochures while I was there to find out more about them.

Now some of my favorite towns in Indiana are those that might not seem too special if you’re just traveling through. Towns like Richmond, New Castle, and Noblesville are much higher on my list today.

Another thought, if you’re into museum exhibits, check to see what’s coming up in your city and cities that are within a day trip. Some of the best exhibits I’ve seen have been in Chicago, Dayton, and Columbus, Ohio.

2. Seek out Free Activities: Festivals, Art Shows, etc.

One of my favorite activities to take part in during mid summer to early fall is to attend festivals throughout Michigan and Indiana.

For example, in Traverse City, MI they have the National Cherry Festival. Many people who tell you that they’ve been to Traverse City is because of this festival. While I’ve never been, I know it’s a great time.

That said, there are tons of other festivals that are going on around the area at this time due to the harvest period. One of these festivals is called the Venetian Festival which takes place in the town that I’d visit my great aunt in yearly – Charlevoix.

If you like fireworks and being up close to them when they’re going off, their Friday night display could possibly be one of the best shows you’ve ever seen!

After that, I always make it a point to go to Indiana festivals including the Johnny Appleseed Festival, James Dean Festival, and any others that might be happening in Indy. Many these festivals have tons of artisans selling their wares – so festivals make great places to find one of a kind gifts.

Not in the Michiana area? Check and see what kind of festivals are in your area!

3. Let your Phone Guide You

Some of my favorite apps help me discover towns (and cheap gas) I’m traveling through. If you haven’t added them to your phone yet, check out these out:

 

Gas Buddy

One of the first apps I downloaded when I got my first Android back in 2010. It’s changed a bit since then, but still pretty useful if you like shaving a few bucks off your fillup.

During my quick detours off the interstate, I might find myself traveling a few miles to get to where I’m going. During that time, the area might catch my eye for future exploration. This is especially true in Indy when a quick drop off of i-465 might lead me to discover a new store.

 

Yelp

Tired of the same ol’ cuisine? Maybe want to see if there’s any new stores in your area? This is a classic app that I’ve been a fan of over the years. Those that take the time to review on here are usually very transparent, so what you see in the reviews of a place is probably right. You can’t say that all the time for Google Reviews.

 

FieldTrip

Perhaps you’re the type that while you’re driving down the road, you don’t mind a notification that suggests you might like a certain landmark that’s a mile or two off this upcoming exit. Or maybe you’re staying with some extended relatives and want to make yourself your own tour guide of the area?

If either of these seem plausible, you’ll love this app.

Side note: If you live near or in Virginia and you haven’t witnessed the Natural Bridge – you have to go check it out and many of the caves in the area.

 

4. Wander until Your Curiosity Piques!

When I was in high school, there was a popular activity called “Cruisin’” that many of us took part in. If you’re not familiar with the term, It’s basically when you’d aimlessly cruise up and down a certain main stretch on a given evening and eventually bump into friends from school. Then, depending on who was out, you might continue on the same route or perhaps you and a convoy of friends would go on a short excursion somewhere in a nearby town or country.

People had been doing this for decades, so it was ingrained pretty heavily as “something to do” in my hometown.

When I was in college, I took this method to explore Lafayette and the surrounding counties so that I felt like I actually knew where I was. I’d go drive to the Purdue airport and watch planes take off and land while I was doing some homework. Heck, I’d even find some legendary backwoods restaurants that only the higher-ups in the community knew about and socialized at.

If you live in a small to mid sized college town and you don’t really know the surrounding area that well, I challenge you to just drive and find out what’s out there without using your phone. Just make sure that you have enough gas so that if you get lost, you can get back to where you started!

5. Switch up your Transportation: Walk, Bike, or Take Public Transportation

When I was at Purdue, I was definitely a different person than I am today. I feel I was certainly more introverted… but I think that’s just the nature of the beast when you’re studying engineering!

When I went to grad school, I felt like I had the opportunity to make changes in my life and one of those changes was, when it was cold, take the bus. Up through this point I had always ridden my bike, but one too many slips made me change my ways.

When I started riding, no one told me that I wasn’t aloud to talk to people on the bus. So I started striking up conversations with whomever I was sitting next to. Interestingly enough, sometimes those conversations were interesting enough that a bus stop might be missed!

Eventually those people I had engaged with before, started shouting back at me. Whether it was on the bus or on campus, there seemed to be people coming out of the woodwork to say hi!

 

6. Check out Nearby Sporting Events

If you’re not into sports, I understand. This might not work for you. But if you’re into one sport, there’s a good chance you might like to dabble in others from time to time.

Or maybe, while visiting other towns, you might want to get a taste for their fandom.

When I’ve visited Pittsburgh, for example, you can’t help but realize that you’re in a sports happy town. Having all their teams’ colors the same really makes it all part of a unified group of fans. Even though the Steelers have been a rival to the Colts over the years, if I was given the opportunity to go to one of their games, I’d consider it to just take in the atmosphere of one of their games.

7. Be a Visiting Friend’s Tour Guide

You know your town better than someone who’s visiting. So what better way to explore than by seeing it from the perspective of a visitor?

When Maria and I were first married, there were a couple of things she hadn’t visited yet in Indy. One was the zoo, believe it or not. Having been there a number of times growing up, I had the chance to show her some of the old exhibits as well as learn about the new ones that they had put in there in recent years.

 

8. Try New Restaurants in your Town or your Friend’s Favorites in Theirs

If you’re in a medium sized town to the size of a city, there’s no reason why you should run out of places to go try out on a week to week basis.

When I was at Purdue, we had a selection of all kinds of international cuisine. Plus, some restaurants would change from year to year while others, like XXX, have been staples for years.

Make it a point to try as many places as you can so you really have a taste of the town your in. And likewise, when you’re visiting friends in other towns, have them take you to their favorite places as well as experimental ones. You might help them find a new favorite!

 

9. Make a Bucket List and Commit to Achieving It

I remember a few years ago a friend of mine randomly went skydiving with a group of her friends. They didn’t stop talking about that event for the entire year.

Is there something that you’d want to do in your area? Maybe it doesn’t have to be skydiving. Maybe you could just learn how to fly a plane? Or perhaps take pictures?

Maybe 2018 is the year that you stop talking about something and finally actually do it?

 

10. Create a Mini-Adventure!

If you’re finding it hard to find something to do, then maybe you can make a circuit of activities. Having been part of AMS for awhile, I know that there’s some adventure races out there. And if there’s nothing like that near where you’re at, maybe there’s a scavenger hunt company, or a murder mystery company you could utilize to help you and some friends have a good time together?

 

Action Steps

So hopefully these give you a little spark in coming up with places to go to in your immediate area. The big thing about travel is that it gives you new perspectives. You can find new perspectives in your backyard by simply seeing how others work on their own crafts.

If you have any other ideas in how someone might be able to explore their own backyard, let me know below!

career transition

Launching Your Career Transition: How Your Current 9 to 5 Can Become a Launchpad to Fulfilling Your New Personal Mission

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For many of us creatives, we come from a background of working a 9 to 5 job. Many of us weren’t lucky enough to grow up in a family who did business for themselves. So we’ve had to make the transition from working the corporate ladder to following our own dreams and goals.

Making this transition can be painful. Many times, bosses will be suspicious of our plans if they even hear about us starting our business. Or, even worse, they might see it as a threat and find ways to get rid of us.

For me, I can’t say it was all that difficult to quit the formal education world when I moved to full time at AMS. They had made it pretty clear that my “extracurricular” teachings weren’t appreciated all that much. In fact, one of them WAS threatened by what I was teaching. He thought I trying to keep people from pursuing a higher degree.

The truth was simpler than that: I just wasn’t all that great at being a math teacher. But what I was good at was helping people get better at being themselves.

Since then, I’ve thought about how this might have gone better for me. What could I have done differently that wouldn’t have threatened my coworkers so much? What I’ve realized as I’ve worked with others through the same issues here in the last couple of years, is that there was a couple of things I could have done better.

So, I thought I’d share those realizations with you in this post as well as some of the things I actually go right!

 

Show Interest in Your Colleagues

One thing that I could have definitely improved on what my interest in the lives of others. Back at that point, I was still learning how to converse with other people without coming off as a weirdo.

The secret to that is to learn about people without interrogating them. Just play it cool and find out if they have family or what their hobbies are. Find out what kind of problems they have in their job. People love to talk about themselves, so you’re just giving them a reason to actually talk to you.

They’ll probably appreciate it, too. The older you get, the more you realize that people are in their own little worlds. No one takes the time to learn about other people these days.

…and Your Boss

Those that are above you in the chain of command are usually there to manage others. If anything goes wrong, they step in and fix it.

That said, if you want to be recognized by your superiors, the best way is to find out how you can help them out. What kind of problems do they need help with? Can you help them? If so, what’s a solution to their problems?

The more you come up with good ideas to help them, the more valuable you’ll be viewed.

 

Become Interesting Yourself

As you become more interested in those around you at work, again, they’ll start to see you in a different light. If they have good people skills, they’ll ask you about you about your life just as you asked about them.

On top of talking about the typical things, now would be a great time to start sharing some of the core things that you’re interested in. Doing so will make you stand out. Mainly because people are used to others complaining in the typical daily routine.

 

Learn to Know When You’re Sharing Value vs Your Interests

After a few weeks or months in getting to know others, you might be realizing that some of people might be ignoring you. If so, this is because you might be sharing your interests a bit too much.

Instead of blatantly sharing your interests, do this instead:

As they probably know what your interests are and you know what their pain points are, ask yourself about what you know that can help them.

You don’t have to have every little thing figured out. Just show that you’ve noticed, have been thinking about it, and you’d love to chat about some potential solutions that you have in mind.

Those that appreciate solutions being solved might actually be blown away that you care enough to follow through with their pains. You might even gain a friend or two in the process!

 

Avoid Negativity as much as Possible

Because the world is the way it is, problems are usually discussed much more so than solutions. This is even more true in the workplace.

Now that some people start to recognize you as someone with solutions (or a fixer), they might start coming to you with other problems in their lives. “What do you think about this?” and “What do you think about what THEY’RE doing?”

At this point, you could easily bash some other person in favor of your own methods.

Being an ENTJ, this is what I naturally did. My judgement (the J in ENTJ) always lead first after them saying what the problem was. Then followed by the INtuitive Thinking.

This approach tended to get me into trouble.

Instead, what I started to do is communicate the fact that this is what I saw from their side. If I could see the other perspective, I would explain it to them. And then (this is what I got really good at) make an analogy. It’s my way of showing that I’m actually listening.

If you feel pressed to get solutions at that point, always come from a suggestion perspective: “Maybe the situation is this. Have you thought about this?”

If you refuse to go down that negative rabbit hole, then people will only see you as solutioned oriented.

 

Continue to Better Yourself

As you build these better relationships inside of current workplace, you should continue to build that “ahead of the curve forward thinker”. As I’ve said in recent posts, part of your personal mission is constantly build on your craft. You’ll be able to provide more value to those around you.

A lot of the time, you’ll need to get out of your comfort zone. In fact, nothing ever gets better unless you move out of your comfort zone. As you start to be recognized as a solution provider, sometimes you might have to say things that aren’t that friendly. But if someone has it coming, then you’ll be respected by those who matter.

And speaking of getting out of your comfort zone, it helps to look as if you do go the extra mile. If your office dresses a certain way, dress a little better than what’s considered normal. You want to stick out in a good way when opportunity comes knocking.

 

Action Steps

So there’s a few things that I’ve picked up along the way. A lot of which comes from my wife who’s had a career in HR. These are subjects that she has to deal with all the time – especially dealing with negativity and building connections with the right people.

So, tell me about you. If you’re in your 9 to 5 still, is this something that you could use to catapult yourself out of your current position? Have you already started with any of these techniques? What kind of success have you had?

I realize there are toxic offices out there that aren’t very supportive at all. If you find yourself in one of those, feel free to connect with me directly.

self mastery

12 Principles for Self Mastery: How I Went from a Scarcity Mindset to one of Abundance

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For me, it’s important to go over some of these past articles to see how far I’ve come. This one is another classic post from my days in LTD.

As I’ve expressed in several posts, it was during this time that I learned what would later become the foundation of all my entrepreneurial knowledge. It was inexpensive training that I thought (and still think) anyone could benefit from. That said, MLM’s are not for everyone. So that’s why I wrote these pieces early on – to help bring that knowledge to a wider group.

In this post originally dated December 4th, 2011, I list 12 principles which were really important to me at the time. They helped me move from a scarcity mindset to one that was more abundant.

If you’re looking for some good principles to base your self improvement on – this is a good place to start! Enjoy!

As you know, I’m making a major push in my life to actually get things done that I’ve wanted to achieve for several years now. One of those things is hire a professional coach. It’s been almost a year since mom passed, and I really need to get moving forward with creating a my own functional business. With the release of the LTD Media and Message Apps, I have been reminded more frequently of my Amway business, but truth be told – I haven’t taken much action. So I believe a coach there will surely help.

One thing I’ve realized during my time in LTD is that I want to surround myself with people who have an abundant thinking process. While not everyone has the same personality (some are more emotion oriented than others), I believe that living a life of abundance is something everyone can do.

It’s just a few core principles away – specifically 12.

So here are those principles I hope you can use to get out of whatever funk you might be finding yourself in!

The Principles of Self Mastery

1. Challenges aren’t Problems, They’re Opportunities

Problems are negative by definition. When you call a challenge an opportunity, then it’s turned into a positive situation where you can learn, grow, and meet your full potential.

2. Walls of Opportunity

With the previous statement, we see that obstacles in our life are there for us to grow and learn from. We can learn how to go over, go around, go under or exterminate problems in our lives. Once we do this, they’re no longer an unsolvable barrier to limit us from who we are.

3. Ideal or Nothing

It’s not ready, aim, fire. It’s ready, fire, aim. It is always better to take dumb action even though it’s not the exact action you want to take. Don’t miss opportunities because you’re trying to find or force the perfect one.

4. Time vs Priorities

Everyone that is, has been, or will be, has had the same amount of time in a day, week, month, and year (unless, of course, we colonize another planet with a different definition of time). With that said, the reason why people don’t achieve more in their life is because they don’t know how to prioritize better than what they’re currently prioritizing. Next time you’re tempted to say “I don’t have time,” remember yourself that you determined yourself that it was you who determined it wasn’t a high enough priority. Doing this will help you realize what you really value and how you can prioritize tasks and activities.

5. Good vs. Great

The enemy of Great isn’t bad – it’s good. Many times we don’t achieve something great because we didn’t do something bad, it’s because we did something good and settled for that particular result.

6. Thinking Not Knowing

Have you ever thought about the response “I don’t know” when you asked someone “What do you think?”? If you think about it, that’s not even the right response to that question. No one asked what the other person knows – they were asked what they thought. If someone asks you what you think, don’t be afraid to let them know what you think. If anything, you open up dialogue and communication with others.

7. The Multiplier Rule

When we take positive action, that action will be multiplied into two positive actions and so on. This rule could also be thought of as the Domino Effect as well as “adding a zero to a partner’s income”.

8. Values in Life

Whatever your values are, it is important to know what yours are and to make choices that are logically connected to them.

9. Roller Coaster Effect

Inconsistent action leads to a roller coaster effect of results. The more consistent your activity is in getting a result, the more likely it will be that you get that result. Consistent effort and follow through will make a huge difference in achieving your goals and dreams.

10. Focus and Duplication

You can do more with your time if you realize that 20% of your effort produces 80% of yours results. Once you know what 20%, spend your time on that 20% and figure out what tools, people, and systems can help with the other 80% of that effort. Don’t focus on making people exact copies of you – help them become a better version of themselves and show them where they fit into the big picture.

11. Stewardship

What gifts and traits do you naturally possess? What traits do others have? Figure out your strengths and share them with those less fortunate. If you do not, they will lose, but you will have the biggest loss. Help someone today!!

12. Never Quit

Mistakes and errors are learning opportunities. They’re not disastrous!! Learn from them and move on. You’ll be better the next time!! Failure to do so will result in disaster.

Action Steps

So really nothing to out of the ordinary here, right? I’ll tell you, when I first heard them, they made sense – but it didn’t seem like life could be THAT easy!!

Over time, though, I’ve realized that they have a ton of merit. Just like the Four Agreements.

Speaking of which, how do you think they relate to the Four Agreements or other rules that you might have heard? What would you add to this list? Let me know below in the comments!

 

relationship building

Making Winning Connections: Relationship Building Tips for Life and Business

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As the Junto is starting to grow, I realize that there’s going to be more and more opportunities for people to connect with others who are seemingly going the same direction as they are.

To make sure they are, here’s a few notes from a recent John Maxwell course called the Mentor’s Guide to Relationships. I hope you can use the information presented here to make sure that a pursuing a certain relationship is worth your time.

At the very least, I want to help you realize if you’re in a one way relationship. One that you might be putting way too much energy in yourself and not getting anything back from it.

So let’s start off by looking at the four different levels of relationships.

 

Four Levels of Relationships

Surface Relationships

Now, when you’re on social media (or anywhere else for that matter) and you’re just meeting someone – you’re engaging in the most basic and common form of a relationship. A surface relationship is one where there’s really no strong commitment from either person and it’s a very passive interaction.

An example of a surface level relationship is just randomly adding a “friend” on Facebook and they in turn accepting that request. You might have just added them to your friends list because they have a lot of mutual friends – even though you don’t really know who they are.

Acquaintances would be part of this this level.

Just remember, all real friends start off as strangers at one point. So, just give it some time if you want things to grow…

 

Structured Relationships

The next level of a relationship is what’s called the structured relationship. These relationships are with people who meet at certain times. This can mean daily, weekly, or monthly.

Generally speaking this type of routine based engagement is centered around some sort of interest or activity such as an Meetup. In the online business world, it might mean a mastermind group. Or in the typical offline world, it can mean a group of students.

Outside of that group, there’s not much meaning for those people to interact – so they don’t.

 

Secure Relationships

The next level of relationships are those that when members of a structured relationships start appreciating the bond.

At this level, trust begins to form as the need to spend more time together grows. Most of the time, these folks will have no problems sharing with each other. And there’s a bit of a comfort zone feeling with these folks.

When you were going to school, these were the study friends. Perhaps they were the friends  that you hung out with before games. Or maybe they were your fellow band friends who you’d play euchre with each day. But the main thing was that these folks started relying on you as you relied on them.

In business, this might be someone that you decide to joint venture with on a particular project such as a course or new podcast.

 

Solid Relationships

Next up, we have the highest of all relationships – the solid relationship. At this level, not only do full trust and confidentiality exist, but there is a need to give back to the other party if they’ve helped you in some way.

Of course, this is the basis for a long term relationship.

If we were to think of the school analogy, your close friends were (or are still) examples of this! While, in the business world, you’d start new businesses with these folks.

 

Avoid High Maintenance Relationships

When I first started dating Maria I had a very strong feeling of “normality” when we were together. She felt like someone that I had known for a long time.

Society suggests – especially TV – that a normal romantic relationship is something that has a lot of maintenance to it. Drama and fighting is to be expected – not calmly discussing the issues at hand.

The truth is that this shouldn’t be the case in ANY relationship you want to make long term – including romantic relationships!

So how do you know if you’re in a high maintenance relationship?

In his book, High Maintenance Relationships, author Les Parrott talks about 12 different types of people who it would be hard to get along with – especially over a significant amount of time.

  • Critic – constantly complains and gives unwanted advice.
  • Martyr – forever the victim and wracked with self-pity.
  • Wet Blanket – pessimistic and automatically negative.
  • Steam Roller – blindly insensitive to others.
  • Gossip – spreads rumors and leaks secrets.
  • Control Freak – unable to let go and let be.
  • Backstabber – irrepressibly two-faced.
  • Cold Shoulder – disengages and avoids contact.
  • Green Eyed Monster – seethes with envy.
  • Volcano – builds steam and is ready to erupt.
  • Sponge – constantly in need but gives nothing back.
  • Competitor – keeps track of tit for tat.

 

Are you with one of these types of individuals? If so, you might want to move on.

If you wouldn’t be in romantic relationships with someone with one or several of these particular traits, why would you want to be in business with them… or visa versa?

Going from Surface to Solid Relationships

In the past week, I’ve relearned how awkward people can be when it comes to developing real relationships. Whether it’s simple friendships, jv partnerships, or going after a life partner… the goal is to not be a weirdo.

Believe me, I learnt the hard way!

So how do you go from adding a friend on Facebook to making them a good friend, business partner, or building something that could be even more?

Here’s 5 traits of a solid relationship.

 

Mutual Enjoyment

Here’s the truth. Spend time with people who enjoy your presence. If you feel that you’re having to pry and overly try with the relationship, it’s probably not a good foundation and you should move on.

Don’t be an irritant!

 

Respect

What’s the best way to make sure you’re not an irritant?

Be respectful of the other person.

Forget the golden rule of treating people how you’d want to be treated. Instead, treat people like they would like to be treated.

What’s that mean?

Learn how they want to be interpreted. Find out their story. Be curious and let them be the storyteller. Find out where they went to school and for what. If they didn’t go to school, find out what they’ve learned “the hard way”.

If you’re unclear as to how to read a certain topic with them – don’t feel like you have to assume something – this usually works out negatively if you do. No question is dumb. Just say “I’m not sure how to ask this but…” if you’re completely unsure how to ask something.

Have a problem with them? Let them know. Likewise, if they feel like they have a problem with you, they should come to you about it.

Make a point to get to know someone, but not for manipulative purposes. If they tell you something that’s a secret, don’t tell anyone. If they are hesitant in a certain area, learn how to help bring out the best in them through their own permission.

 

Mutual Shared Experiences

There’s a reason why military veterans get along as well as they do even if they didn’t know each other prior to them first getting together.

What’s the reason?

They have shared similar experiences.

From day 1, they’re taught to trust each other to be part of a larger organism. When you count on someone to do a certain action which allows you to do your job, then you’re going to care about that other person more. Cause if they get taken out, then you won’t be able to do what you need to do properly.

Sports players are the same way.

When talking about developing a winning football team, Vince Lombardi said, “The difference between mediocrity and greatness is the feeling these guys have for each other.”

It makes sense. If the line doesn’t do their job and block, then the ball handlers can’t do their jobs. The result is that the ball doesn’t go anywhere.

 

Reciprocity

For the above teams to win, that caring feeling needs to be mutual between teammates – whether on a battlefield with bullets… or on the gridiron.

Right here is how you can tell if a relationship is worth your time to develop. If you feel like everything is running smoothly, then everything is fine.

However, if you feel that the other person is getting a better deal, bring it up with them. If they don’t acknowledge it, then it might be time to move onto another relationship.

If you feel like you’re getting a better deal, then it’s your job to make sure that they’re being evenly compensated.

 

Trust

Trust comes over time and is the result of the previous 4 traits humming along just fine. Don’t forget that intentions don’t really matter when it comes to other people.

It’s all about actions.

When your actions match your words, that’s how you build trust.

Just make sure that those actions are positive and truly helpful to the other party!

 

Action Steps

As you might have realize, relationships are something that I take seriously. There was a time when I wasn’t super great at them – so I made it a point to go out of my way to learn about them. If you want to learn more about building great relationships, I’d check out the book by John Maxwell and Les Parrott 25 Ways to Win with People: How to Make Others Feel Like a Million Bucks

As you probably know, I’m a big fan of John’s and he has ton’s on this topic!